Last February, 2008, I was sitting in a hotel conference room in Ventura. It was 9:00 in the morning and the Landmark Forum was about to begin. I was excited about this “transformational” course, not quite sure what to expect. The adventure that started that morning is turning out to be one of the most impactful events in my life. For those who don’t know about the Landmark Forum, it takes place over three days of a weekend, Friday, Saturday, Sunday plus Tuesday evening. The full days start at 9 am and end at 10 pm.
     There were over 100 people in the room with a seminar leader, no books, and no handouts. It was simply a conversation between the Forum leader and us, and I felt like the conversation was focused on me. She directed me to look at what’s happening right now in my life, where it’s been, and where it’s going. I’m used to goal setting, focusing on the future, where I’m headed. Looking at what’s happening right now in my life, at what was not working so well, was new to me.
     What wasn’t working so well was my family. That led me to phone my Mom and Dad, followed by my brothers. I didn’t stop there, I spoke with my estranged former wife and Brian and Beth, my two grown children. I went to the seminar to improve my business, but after 30 minutes, relationship issues trumped earning more income. Within days of completing the weekend I went to a 21st birthday celebration for Brian – with Leah, my former wife, his mother, attending. We got along like civilized people, happy parents, celebrating the life passage of our son. Because Leah and I had been so distant and cold, this celebration was a miracle.
     Weeks later I planned a family outing with Leah, and both kids. The date arrives, now we’re playing croquet in Oak Park. Beth’s asking us to play children against parents, meaning Leah’s on my side. We play to win, which we do by one stroke. It is a terrific matchrequiring real teamwork! I’m

passing around the chips and salsa finishing off the afternoon with a pot luck picnic. My family suffered through the previous 10 years of my divorce. Events like this were not going to happen without something new being added, in this case the Landmark Forum.
     The Landmark Forum works by getting each participant to look at their own lives, to see the costs of keeping things “the way they are.” Once costs are genuinely exposed and authentically owned avenues for action open that were not there before. Within a framework of responsibility, finding what is missing in the status quo, and creating possibilities that pull for openings to occur, the Landmark Forum is a weekend that absolutely changed my life. I say so unequivocally, because it was eight months ago, and that is how I feel about it today.